Sunday, December 2, 2012

o christmas tree (you suck)



I have said this every year since I have owned a home, but I am serious this time.  I WILL NEVER BUY A REAL CHRISTMAS TREE EVER AGAIN.  I'm buying a fake one after Christmas so I can get the stupid thing on sale, and then we will live in the light of fakeness the whole season next year. 

Just a few of my complaints:

  • It's lopsided.
  • It never quite gets balanced.
  • It almost kills my child.
  • I almost get killed saving my child.
  • It topples and breaks a cherished ornament.  Last year, it was from our honeymoon.  This year, it was one that was handmade from a student.
  • There are bare spots.
  • I sweep.  I vacuum.  I sweep.  I vacuum.

Ugh!  Ugh!  I hate Christmas!!

I really do.  It drives me nuts.  Where is Easter?  Spring, eggs, candy, Jesus is Risen.  Amen.

Despite the wretched afternoon, our morning was simply splendid.  Jeff and I have made it a tradition to go to church and then go pick out our tree.  Last year, Patrick slept through the whole thing.  This year, he was feeling the trees and taking in the scenery.







"A Griswold family Christmas."






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